4/10/96

It's late, and she has turned in for the night. As she huddles under the covers of her small twin bed, her thoughts drift to the idea of a future together. She smiles and imagines a cozy home, and cooking dinner for two, instead of one. She looks around the home, and sees their things decorating their place. He's already said he would work late today, but she'll keep his supper warm in the oven. A simple meatloaf and baked potato wouldn't need much to stay warm.

She curls up on the sofa, and clicks on the TV. She surfs through the TV channels - there's never much on - and stops at the community channel, showing the usual "crawl" of events. But she hasn't stopped to watch, she stopped to listen. They're cueing from the cable country station, and it is an old song she remembers well. She hums to herself as the song plays on ... "old Mr. Webster could never define, what's being said between your heart and mine" ... and she closes her eyes.

She is whisked back to that night on the phone, when she heard it on the radio and told him it was playing. He got "mushy" when she sang it to him. She loved pleasing him, and that night she knew it made him happy to hear her sing it. The phone was their connection then, and music was always a medium to express their feelings.

She opens her eyes, and the song has changed. She flips the channel again, and finding nothing on, she turns off the TV and goes upstairs to the bedroom. She steps out on the balcony and looks up. Even though it is dusk, the sky is still blue - a spectacle she never believed until she saw it. That song about "eyes as blue as the Texas sky" never meant all that much until she was here. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, and the sun shining over the top of the building was casting long shadows in the parking lot, letting a cool breeze into the room through the open balcony door.

A car pulls through the lot, and the windows are open. A phrase or two from an old song come drifting up to her - "wild angels, what else could it be?" She thinks to herself, 'what else could it be? We have been so lucky together, and it would have never have happened if I hadn't visited.'

She steps back in from the balcony and looks around. The bed is made, and there is a stuffed armadillo and a white kitten up by the pillows - that armadillo he gave her at the airport, and her stuffed kitten she gave him for Valentine's Day. She smiles, remembering how they used to curl up with them at night, so the other wouldn't seem so far away.

She walks out of the bedroom, and back down the stairs. She fiddles through CDs until she finds the one she wants. She puts the disc in the player and presses Play. Then she hits skip until she is at the track she wants - number 5. She opens the french doors in the living room to let the breeze in, and set a place at the table for him. She sings along with the song, "but I win when I choose, and I can't stand to lose ..."

She glances at the clock and notes it is getting late. She hears his truck pull up and she opens the door. He steps through the door and kisses her nose - a joke between them. He puts down his paperwork, and hugs her. "Do you want to go gaming tonight with Mark and Heather?"

She smiles and agrees, but only if he will eat a little something first. She pulls out the warm plate from the oven, sets it on the table, and sits down next to him. "I know it isn't a lot, but I thought it might taste good after a long day." She kisses his cheek and goes upstairs to get their cards from the office.

When she comes back down, he has already finished his plate and is rinsing it off in the sink. "You didn't have to clean up, you know. I would have," she says. He shakes his head smiling and puts the plate in the dishwasher.

"We have a few minutes before we have to go," he says. He pulls her onto the couch and snuggles up to her. These are some of their favorite times, just being close to each other. She turns around in his arms and kisses his nose. He responds with the same and then they kiss.

She snuggles up closer, and realizes she is only snuggling with her own blankets. He isn't there, and he won't be there - for awhile. But the thoughts were nice ones, and she smiles as she drifts off to sleep - wondering if he will call her tonight.

Jennifer Kelbaugh

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